Diaper Bag

Now that I am into this mommy thing 17 months and counting I think I am FINALLY getting the hang of packing a diaper bag.  When we left the house when my baby was itty bitty my biggest concern was remembering her, making sure she was strapped into her car seat properly and making it safely to our destination.  Those were my biggest concerns and rightfully so!! I breast fed my daughter so I never had to worry about remembering food - check!  It was when we reached our destination that I heard the criticism, and ALL from the Grandma's!!!

"You forgot the diaper cream!?!?"

"You only have 3 other outfits packed!?!?"

"Where is a hat for her??? What no HAT!?!?!"

"You don't have a bib for her!?!  WHAT no bib!?!?"

"It's 75 degrees outside and you don't have a sweater for her!?!  What's wrong with you!?!?"

"You don't have a blanket for her!?!?!  No blanket!!  Oh just 2 blankets??  Really!?!?"

"She's starving.  You should feed her!!  Don't you ever feed your baby!!!"

"She is crying.  She must have gas!!  Don't you care that your baby has gas!?!?!"

WOW!!  And I am not exaggerating, it was THAT bad! And I could go on for days.  I would always be somewhere with my daughter feeling post-partumish, fat, incompetent and now guilty!!  Thanks!!  As if mom's don't carry enough guilt already.  Sometimes those comments would make me cry, sometimes they wouldn't, sometimes I would just comfort myself by eating and keeping my post partum mouth shut.  I just had to console myself any way I could and I couldn't drink, so nothing would drown out the nagging of the mothers/grandmothers.

Well after months of that and me interpreting such comments as "just what kind of mother are you?" "Should you even be a mother?"  I started wondering what kind of mothers my mother, mother-in-law and Grandmother were.  Of course they would never admit to any of their faults.  Well from the mom's zaniness, my sister's bitchiness, my aunt's "special"ness, my uncle's over compensating with materialistic things, my "in-laws" lack of ability to speak without screaming and my Grandma's coddling ways I knew I had my answer. It kind of hurt my feelings that out of all the mother's I knew none of them came forward and admitted their faults or gave super, honest advice that I could really use. Not one.  They just seemed to judge. 

Being a mom and just doing it and being in the midst of it all is really the best and only way to learn.  Do what's best for you and your baby.  Seriously!!  You could read all the books in the world but no two babies or mother's are alike - you do the math!! The possibilities are endless.

So just do what your gut tells you to do, go with what your babies eyes, sounds and reactions are telling you.  Just do your best. Not someone else's.  I had to mutter that to myself all the time to even fight back the tears (damn hormones) sometimes. "I'm doing my best.  I'm doing my best."

My baby didn't like having layers, upon layers of clothing and blankets.  I knew that, my mom's didn't.  I knew that my baby never liked wearing hats, still doesn't, but they would force them on my sweet baby's little noggin just for her to grab at them.

One time I took M to my mom's while we went to a movie and I forgot to pack diapers.  I know. I know.  My mom yelled at me, made me feel shitty and reminded me of how my daughter felt walking around in a pinned together dish towel and stressed the traumatizing event some more.  Well that hurt my feelings more than she knows, but I could have done the same and turned it around on her and said  "what Grandma doesn't have diapers on hand. Huh!?!  Huh!?!"  But I didn't.  It's not like we live in the dark ages since there are these places called stores and they are everywhere.  I would even say there are hundreds where diapers can be purchased and it's not like my mom is hurting for money.  So don't fall for the guilt game.  We all survived.  My baby will never remember the dish towel diaper 9plus I thought it looked quite comfortable), we enjoyed the movie immensely and did my mom learn!?!  No!! I had to be the one to buy diapers and leave them at her house.  Have I learned?  Yes. Lots.

Here is some diaper bag advice.

You could go with something all nice and organized like this.........

Or go with this.......


• buy multiple diaper creams so you can leave one in the diaper bag at all times.
• leave the diaper bag in the laundry room or near it if it's convenient so you can empty the dirty clothes/bibs and add clean ones right out of the wash. 
• OVER pack!  Seriously.  Get kind of obnoxious with it.  For one trip to Grandma's pack 10 diapers, 6 bibs, 5 outfits, 10 pairs of socks, 4 hats, 2 packs of wipes, 3 diaper creams, 2 blankets and a bottle of anti-gas medicine - just to show you care!
• have a non-girly diaper bag for daddy to carry around with confidence.

That's it for now.